D) An Elderly Lady Takes a Taxi

Taxi! Taxi! (Taxi draws up at curb, stops.) Will you help me with my bags, please? Certainly. (Taxi driver gets out of cab, helps wom­an with bags.)

I also have a trunk. Can I take it along with me?

It's over there on the baggage platform.

There is a charge for all trunks. It will cost you a

dollar and a quarter. But you can take it with you.

I'll strap it on the trunk rack in the rear.

I suppose it will be perfectly safe there.

(Taxi driver proceeds to strap trunk on rear of cab.)

Where are you going?

I want to go to 435 Riverside Drive. And, driver, please drive very carefully. I'm a very nervous woman.

Don't worry. (Puts car in gear and speeds off.)

This is the first time I have ever been in a taxi-cab in New York City. Incidentally, what is the fare to 435 Riverside Drive?

It will cost you around a dollar and a half.

You're quite sure it won't be any more?

It may cost you ten or fifteen cents more. I can't tell exactly. But whatever it is, it will show on the meter.

What is the meter?

The meter is this metal box to my right Whenev­er we start out with a passenger we put the flag up and that starts the meter functioning. Themeter registers the distance and shows the exact amount of the fare.

— You must excuse my ignorance, but this is also the first time I've been in New York City. We don't have taxis like this at home where I come from.

— Where do you come from?

— I come from a small town in Illinois that I am sure you never even heard of. We have only one taxi-cab in the whole town. And must you drive so fast? I'm sure you must be going at least forty miles an hour.

—When the lights are with me, I naturally have to take advantage of them. I can't hold up all the traffic.

— I'm sure that I could never drive a car in New York City. Doesn't it make you nervous to drive every day in so much traffic?

— No, Madam!

— Do you have many accidents?

— No, Madam.

— I do hope we don't have an accident on the way.

— (A little exasperated.) Listen, Lady? I don't want an accident any more than you do. I just got out of the hospital a week ago, and I have no desire to go back.

— You were in the hospital? You poor man! What was the matter! I suppose you were in a serious accident.

— (Determined to end conversation.) No, it was a mental case.

— Good gracious!